You learn something new everyday...

I found this out one year ago today when I decided to cut all my hair off and go natural.  A big chop is what it is called officially, but I was not cutting my hair for any reason of significance; I wanted a new look.  The natural do's were really showing out and I wanted to get in on the fun.  And fun it wasn't.

There should be a disclaimer for women who decide to cut it all off and go natural.  The disclaimer should read: Your hair will be ADORABLE the first five months.  Don't be fooled by it.  At month six, you will get the first glimpse of YOUR natural hair.  And you won't like it.

Why not?  Because your hair no longer looks cute in your favorite style.  Yes the one that you have been doing for the past couple months because every other style pales in comparison.  It will never look right again.

Let me stop.  Yes it will; but it will be about four months later when you try the style out of desperation with the hope that it will save you.

And it will.  And your faith in natural hair will be restored.  Then you will begin to LOVE your hair.
 

For the love of natural hair

I will start by saying that when I began this journey I was the biggest optimist.  I had been relaxed since I was six years old and I had finally come to a place in my life where I wanted something different so off it went--and down went my self-esteem.

Throughout my natural hair journey there were only a few times that I was truly a fan of my natural mane- the first 4 weeks and weeks 12-16.  So sad I can recall that but that is how much of an impact it had on me.  The excess work and dedication was not what I thought I was signing up for.  Not to mention the frizz and tangling.  "What the hell did I do!!" was a question I often asked myself.  Now, at 9 months natural, I can truly say that I have developed a deep love for my natural hair.

As I look back on my journey, I realize that a lot of other things were going on in my life that influenced my negative feelings towards my hair.  My 30-lb weigh gain and dissatisfaction with my job were huge contributors to these feelings.  How can you love your hair when you are not in love with your body and in constant wonder about your mental state?  At times I felt like I was a prisoner of all these things. Then one day I woke up and realized that all of the issues going on in my life were preventable; so I decided to take back what was mine.

20 lbs and a new job later, I finally get it.  My dislike for my natural hair had nothing to do with the texture.  It had everything to do with me and my inability to be in control of my life.  I also now understand that what is beautiful changes over time.  In my early 20s beauty was external with no internal connection.  Now I can really marvel in the fact that external beauty is directly connected to your internal feelings about yourself. 

The Big Move

Hello blogspot!  So its been a while, I know.  A lot has changed since my last post.  For one, I am back in Virginia.  After months of unhappiness, I decided that I had to make a change so I took a job at the University of Virginia.  I will say that it has been a bit of a transition.  More work but less stress. There are pros and cons to every situation though, so I am trying to take it all in stride.  I will say this; I miss the hell out of my UCF coworkers.  The camaraderie was awesome.  The quietness in my new office is deafening. 

The other difficult part is I went from a long distance relationship to an even longer distance relationship.  This has been the hardest transition of all.   I am finally in a relationship with someone that makes me optimist about the future and one day becoming a plus 1, but being so far apart puts a bit of fear and doubt in my heart.  I am praying for the best.  They say patience is a virtue. Guess I am about to get a first hand lesson in it. 

Another discovery in my natural hair journey

Soooooooo I was in Macy's the other day looking at Carol's Daughter hair products when I started reading some handouts from her.  One of them talked about the "scab hair period". This hair period is the first 6-8 months of your hair grown.  According to Carol that is not your true curl pattern because your hair is growing out of damaged hair follicles. Once the follicles heal, your true curl pattern will start to come through.  I don't know how true this is, but it gives me something else to look forward to!

Reflecting on 2012

I woke up this morning to a phone call from the University of Virginia to officially offer me the position of tutor coordinator. After talking to the women in HR I started to reflect on everything that has happened this year.  The year started with me dating someone I was not very interested in and ended with me being in love with a wonderful man. Of course each year starts with me in financial ruins (that is a bit extreme I know) but this year is ending with financial blessings.  I started the year with relaxed hair and I am ending it natural and getting to the point where I love my hair.  This year I lost a close friend but reconciled with an old one.  I am transitioning into a position that will allow me to try new things and change a tutor program for the better.  As I type this I realize that this year I got something in my life that I have always lacked in the past: balance.  More than any other blessing from above I am thankful for that. I am praying that this will continue to be constant in my life.  finally I am looking forward to seeing what 2013, and age 29, will bring.

It's been a minute!

Wow time sure does fly.  I didn't realize it had been this long since I hit up the blog.  In the past few weeks I have been dealing with a few things: my hair and my spiritual walk.  I feel like I am at a crossroads in my spiritual walk.  I am not sure where to go next so keep me in your prayers as I listen and walk with God.

As my hair gets longer, it is becoming more and more difficult for me to manage. Since my post about my first official bad hair day, I have had about 10 bad hair days.  This may sound a bit conceited, but I am used to looking a certain way with minimal effort.  Natural hair definitely makes you redefine what beauty is!  Yesterday was really bad, so after viewing numerous YouTube clips, I decided to try finger shingling.  Oh I am in absolute LOVE with my hair!  It looks so shiny and neat.  I have absolutely NO frizz, which is something I was beginning to think was impossible.  I think I found my twa style, YAY!

Through all of the difficulties of the past few weeks, I am so glad that my relationship is still going strong.  Normally it would be the first thing to go, but I think I have found the man that fits me.  Never thought I would say that.  Boy does it feel nice...

The ugly phase

So I think I have reached my "ugly" phase; the phase in your natural hair process when no matter what you do, every day is a bad hair day.  Today was bad hair day five.  My hair routine was working perfectly until this week: Co-wash, oil, gel and go.    You Tube has been my best friend these past few days viewing natural hair clips one after the other.  Nothing has worked.  The up side to all of this is that my hair is growing so quickly.  The down side is nothing that I do is preventing this frizziness.  Maybe it will quickly grow through this phase.  My fingers are crossed...