Hello babies! A lot has been going on in my world lately: wedding planning, trying to figure out where we want to settle, and dealing with the angst that comes with full-time employment. I can truly say that I am OVER it. My mom used to always say to put it in the hands of the Lord; so that is what I am going to do. I know that the Lord will cover me and keep me dry in the midst of the storm (with one of those pretty clear umbrellas), so I am going to stay focused on that. Prayer warriors: Keep my fiance' and I in your prayers.
God's got it!
Wednesday, April 1, 2015
Saturday, February 28, 2015
My journey through 30
Almost 30 days ago I turned 31. I know that sentence alone is making you say, " so how is she going to speak about a JOURNEY? It's only been a year!" Well in such a short time, I have realized that 30s are so different from the 20s.
At 18 I realized that I was not in the body that I thought I should be in. At 163 I felt fat; not unattractive, just fat. That feeling alone was enough to affect the way that I viewed myself. Because I felt fat, I did not feel completely beautiful. Sure I can blame that on society and how it portrays overweight women, but I have to take ownership for that feeling as well. Instead of focusing on the other beautiful things about myself though, I opted to lose weight. And I did. In 2 years I lost 45 lbs and I knew I had solved that beauty issue. Embracing what my best friend and I call the Skinny Girl Syndrome, I basked in my new body. I wore skimpy outfits and drank in the flattery and admiration from men and women alike. All through my 20s I leaned on my body coupled with my cute face and I allowed it to make me feel like I reached the standard of beauty that everyone wants to reach. Then I turned 28 and slacked on my workout. At 29 I slacked on my eating and continued to neglect physical fitness. I gained 30 lbs. To make matters worse, I went natural, something else that made me question my beauty because it was not conventional. At 30 I moved back to Virginia and decided that I needed to get back on track and find my "beauty" again; I also went back to the creamy crack.
If you want to lose lbs, Weight Watchers is the way to go. By April I had lost 30 lbs without lifting a single weight or running a single lap. Couple that with my straight relaxed hair and in my mind all I could think was I'm BACK! 6 months later, I gained ALL of the weight back, and I lost ALL of what I thought beauty should be. My "beauty" was gone...again. Back to the overweight girl of my teens that loathed her stomach and big arms. Even my relaxed hair didn't make me feel beautiful. Then one day I woke up and realized why my "beauty" was gone. It wasn't because of my weight or my hair. It was simply because I did not know what beauty truly was.
At 31 I think I know. All of these years I have based beauty on my looks. That has NOTHING to do with it. Beauty is how you view yourself. Beauty is how you treat strangers. Beauty is how you love others. Beauty is in your goals, aspirations, and dreams. Your mental state makes you beautiful. The way you feel inside is the way that you look on the outside. If you value God, yourself, others, and nature it will show on the outside; it will produce a glow that weight loss and straight hair cannot match. The best part of all is that all of those things make you beautiful on the outside as well. My mission is different now. I still want to lose 30 lbs. Not because I want to look good in a dress, but because I want to do it for my future: my future kids, my future husband, MY future. Being here for them and for myself motivates me to change my lifestyle. To me that is the true definition of beauty.
At 18 I realized that I was not in the body that I thought I should be in. At 163 I felt fat; not unattractive, just fat. That feeling alone was enough to affect the way that I viewed myself. Because I felt fat, I did not feel completely beautiful. Sure I can blame that on society and how it portrays overweight women, but I have to take ownership for that feeling as well. Instead of focusing on the other beautiful things about myself though, I opted to lose weight. And I did. In 2 years I lost 45 lbs and I knew I had solved that beauty issue. Embracing what my best friend and I call the Skinny Girl Syndrome, I basked in my new body. I wore skimpy outfits and drank in the flattery and admiration from men and women alike. All through my 20s I leaned on my body coupled with my cute face and I allowed it to make me feel like I reached the standard of beauty that everyone wants to reach. Then I turned 28 and slacked on my workout. At 29 I slacked on my eating and continued to neglect physical fitness. I gained 30 lbs. To make matters worse, I went natural, something else that made me question my beauty because it was not conventional. At 30 I moved back to Virginia and decided that I needed to get back on track and find my "beauty" again; I also went back to the creamy crack.
If you want to lose lbs, Weight Watchers is the way to go. By April I had lost 30 lbs without lifting a single weight or running a single lap. Couple that with my straight relaxed hair and in my mind all I could think was I'm BACK! 6 months later, I gained ALL of the weight back, and I lost ALL of what I thought beauty should be. My "beauty" was gone...again. Back to the overweight girl of my teens that loathed her stomach and big arms. Even my relaxed hair didn't make me feel beautiful. Then one day I woke up and realized why my "beauty" was gone. It wasn't because of my weight or my hair. It was simply because I did not know what beauty truly was.
At 31 I think I know. All of these years I have based beauty on my looks. That has NOTHING to do with it. Beauty is how you view yourself. Beauty is how you treat strangers. Beauty is how you love others. Beauty is in your goals, aspirations, and dreams. Your mental state makes you beautiful. The way you feel inside is the way that you look on the outside. If you value God, yourself, others, and nature it will show on the outside; it will produce a glow that weight loss and straight hair cannot match. The best part of all is that all of those things make you beautiful on the outside as well. My mission is different now. I still want to lose 30 lbs. Not because I want to look good in a dress, but because I want to do it for my future: my future kids, my future husband, MY future. Being here for them and for myself motivates me to change my lifestyle. To me that is the true definition of beauty.
Monday, February 23, 2015
Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
I'm backkkkk! After another hiatus from my beloved blog, I felt compelled to write about what's new in the world of Erica. First off, I have been a fiancee' now for about 6 months! My hunny proposed to me on August 15th. It was so beautiful and thoughtful! Since then I have been planning away at this wedding. The first week I was so motivated I almost lost my fiancee'--something about let's enjoy being engaged before we jump right into planning...Blah, blah, blah! I guess he doesn't know how fast venues and photographers book up! To appease him though, I stopped planning for a few weeks (after I booked the venue of course)!
Then I met Tina. Tina opened my mind to all things wedding and got me back on track with the planning--I just had to have her decorate and plan our wedding.
Fast forward two months and I find the dress of my dreams; until I see the price! Eek! I began to think. Do I LOVE this dress or do I love this dress? So back to the drawing board. 2 1/2 months later I find my second dream dress and I know I can't get married without it. Of course it costs more than the first dream dress though as my luck would have it--but the tears that rolled down my face when I looked in the mirror were priceless: and Ramen isn't THAT bad if you put hot sauce and soy sauce in it.
Who ever thought the hardest part of getting married would be finding a dress for someone else? After going back and forth and considering the opinions of everyone (that was my mistake) I finally picked a dress for them that I liked. I'm sure they will love it too!
So this is where I currently am in the planning process. Save the Dates have been mailed, website is done (at least most of it) and rehearsal dinner location is booked. Sounds like I've done a lot right? I wish! There is still a ton more to do including figure out what I am going to do with my hair since I BIG CHOPPED again! I'm sure I will have more to update in the coming months. Stay tuned!
Then I met Tina. Tina opened my mind to all things wedding and got me back on track with the planning--I just had to have her decorate and plan our wedding.
Fast forward two months and I find the dress of my dreams; until I see the price! Eek! I began to think. Do I LOVE this dress or do I love this dress? So back to the drawing board. 2 1/2 months later I find my second dream dress and I know I can't get married without it. Of course it costs more than the first dream dress though as my luck would have it--but the tears that rolled down my face when I looked in the mirror were priceless: and Ramen isn't THAT bad if you put hot sauce and soy sauce in it.
Who ever thought the hardest part of getting married would be finding a dress for someone else? After going back and forth and considering the opinions of everyone (that was my mistake) I finally picked a dress for them that I liked. I'm sure they will love it too!
So this is where I currently am in the planning process. Save the Dates have been mailed, website is done (at least most of it) and rehearsal dinner location is booked. Sounds like I've done a lot right? I wish! There is still a ton more to do including figure out what I am going to do with my hair since I BIG CHOPPED again! I'm sure I will have more to update in the coming months. Stay tuned!
Thursday, March 20, 2014
Don't call it a comeback
I have neglected my blog once again. I am not sure why I do this; writing is the best form of therapy for me and with all the stuff I feel like I'm going through, a massage is not enough to ease this tension.
With every passing year (30 was the most recent) I learn that life is something else.
Within the last year I have developed a level of pain that sometimes puts me out of commission. The pain comes from Fibromyalgia according to my doctor. Oh how I wish it was a misdiagnosis! The nagging aching pain is enough to make me want to cry sometimes, but I am going to fight through it. Many doctors say it is a mental disorder; I sure hope that is true because I tell myself daily that one day this pain will cease to exist!
On the up side, my boyfriend has relocated to Virginia and things are better than ever...AND he gives me massages when I am in pain so he gets 20 cool points for that.
Until next time...
With every passing year (30 was the most recent) I learn that life is something else.
Within the last year I have developed a level of pain that sometimes puts me out of commission. The pain comes from Fibromyalgia according to my doctor. Oh how I wish it was a misdiagnosis! The nagging aching pain is enough to make me want to cry sometimes, but I am going to fight through it. Many doctors say it is a mental disorder; I sure hope that is true because I tell myself daily that one day this pain will cease to exist!
On the up side, my boyfriend has relocated to Virginia and things are better than ever...AND he gives me massages when I am in pain so he gets 20 cool points for that.
Until next time...
Monday, August 12, 2013
For the Love of Vanity
So I may lose some followers for this post...oh I forgot, I don't have any! So I straightened my hair the other day: I am absolutely in LOVE with it! (well almost, the frizz is the worst). I forgot how much I love straight hair. During the first phases of this natural hair journey I embraced what everyone called the "ugly phase" because that comes with the territory right? Well after 13 months I am beginning to realize what I put in the back of my mind for months: I miss my relaxed hair.
And this is where the vanity comes in. I miss my relaxed hair because I feel like I look much more beautiful with it. Okay you can stop judging now! Not only that though, relaxed hair is so much easier to manage than natural hair. Now I know what you are saying: before you were raving about your natural hair and now you just want to abandon it and go back. Well to defend my case, I went back and read some of my older posts. More often than not, I was talking about the struggles of this journey. I cannot deny that when it was good, it was good, but those moments were so short-lived.
So now I am at a crossroads. But before I jump the gun I decided that I am going to get a Keratin treatment. They say it prevents frizz and makes your natural hair look and feel relaxed. So I'm going to see how that goes. If not, it may be back to the creamy crack.
And this is where the vanity comes in. I miss my relaxed hair because I feel like I look much more beautiful with it. Okay you can stop judging now! Not only that though, relaxed hair is so much easier to manage than natural hair. Now I know what you are saying: before you were raving about your natural hair and now you just want to abandon it and go back. Well to defend my case, I went back and read some of my older posts. More often than not, I was talking about the struggles of this journey. I cannot deny that when it was good, it was good, but those moments were so short-lived.
So now I am at a crossroads. But before I jump the gun I decided that I am going to get a Keratin treatment. They say it prevents frizz and makes your natural hair look and feel relaxed. So I'm going to see how that goes. If not, it may be back to the creamy crack.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Erica Hampton and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day
This book was super hilarious growing up: Now I know what Alexander went through. Fast forward 20 years. Absolutely nothing went right today. I take that back, I did have a good workout this morning. After that, CURTAINS.
Today was a closed door day at work...a locked closed door. To add insult to injury I had to work the extended shift, so I was there until 8 pm...with no dinner...
For some reason I have been anxious all week and today was no different. I think my subconscious even needs a vacation...so does my hair.
Maybe tomorrow will be better.
Today was a closed door day at work...a locked closed door. To add insult to injury I had to work the extended shift, so I was there until 8 pm...with no dinner...
For some reason I have been anxious all week and today was no different. I think my subconscious even needs a vacation...so does my hair.
Maybe tomorrow will be better.
Sunday, June 23, 2013
You learn something new everyday...
I found this out one year ago today when I decided to cut all my hair off and go natural. A big chop is what it is called officially, but I was not cutting my hair for any reason of significance; I wanted a new look. The natural do's were really showing out and I wanted to get in on the fun. And fun it wasn't.
There should be a disclaimer for women who decide to cut it all off and go natural. The disclaimer should read: Your hair will be ADORABLE the first five months. Don't be fooled by it. At month six, you will get the first glimpse of YOUR natural hair. And you won't like it.
Why not? Because your hair no longer looks cute in your favorite style. Yes the one that you have been doing for the past couple months because every other style pales in comparison. It will never look right again.
Let me stop. Yes it will; but it will be about four months later when you try the style out of desperation with the hope that it will save you.
And it will. And your faith in natural hair will be restored. Then you will begin to LOVE your hair.
There should be a disclaimer for women who decide to cut it all off and go natural. The disclaimer should read: Your hair will be ADORABLE the first five months. Don't be fooled by it. At month six, you will get the first glimpse of YOUR natural hair. And you won't like it.
Why not? Because your hair no longer looks cute in your favorite style. Yes the one that you have been doing for the past couple months because every other style pales in comparison. It will never look right again.
Let me stop. Yes it will; but it will be about four months later when you try the style out of desperation with the hope that it will save you.
And it will. And your faith in natural hair will be restored. Then you will begin to LOVE your hair.
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